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West Buttfuck Militia loses bidding war, has to keep shitskull, says EBM spokesman. Despite ongoing tensions caused by fluctuating exchange rates through a city divided, spokesmen from both militias met at the center span of the Municipal Shit Bridge met for a brief name-calling session that ended poorly for all parties. Later, East Buttfuck Militia claimed to be bigger defender of Freedom than West Buttfuck Militia.

WBM was unreachable for comment, speculated to be “rolling their shitskull around like a flat soccer ball.”