{"id":142,"date":"2007-04-09T16:45:40","date_gmt":"2007-04-09T23:45:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/?p=142"},"modified":"2007-04-09T16:45:40","modified_gmt":"2007-04-09T23:45:40","slug":"how-to-remove-old-linoleum","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/?p=142","title":{"rendered":"How to remove old linoleum"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I am extremely sore today and was damn near exhausted last night as the last of the linoleum and it&#8217;s residual felt\/polonium\/asbestos\/goat-blood glue has finally yielded to the mighty spring steel scraper included in my $15 Harbor Freight <em>always-keep-your-receipt<\/em> heat gun kit. Yes, the linoleum is long gone and it was mostly all removed manually, with a springy scraper and short pry bar. Forget everything you&#8217;ve heard about heat guns and chemicals and dry ice to speed the process. Stop thinking this is going to be easy. Quit doing research on shortcuts. Get down on your hands and knees, and start scraping that shit off the floor.<\/p>\n<p>The remnant glue, however, can be taken off fairly easily. Mix up some hot water and vinegar, then just pour it on like fake blood. Give it a while. Pour on some more, let it soak a while longer. Keep it moist. It&#8217;ll come up like butter, only less tasty and possibly toxic. I expect it will take us no more than one very soggy and dirty hour to get the glue scraped up.<\/p>\n<p>Then we can paint. We have the paint and all accessories at the ready, procured from our local independent paint store. Fuck you, Home Despot. <em><strong>Screw you<\/strong><\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>Removing old linoleum is very hard work. Your back shoulders arms wrists &#038;c. will be sore for days. There is no way around this unless you can pay somebody to be sore for you. Accept this as your fate, put on the kneepads, and start scraping that shit up. The sooner you get started, the sooner you can be completely exhausted, smoking a cigarette and drinking a beer, slumped against the fresh drywall. But you will be a sweaty smoking slumped drinker that is done with linoleum.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I am extremely sore today and was damn near exhausted last night as the last of the linoleum and it&#8217;s residual felt\/polonium\/asbestos\/goat-blood glue has finally yielded to the mighty spring steel scraper included in my $15 Harbor Freight always-keep-your-receipt heat gun kit. Yes, the linoleum is long gone and it was mostly all removed manually, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/142"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=142"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/142\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":283,"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/142\/revisions\/283"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=142"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=142"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.sammich.org\/hurr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=142"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}